Last night I went to Charli XCX and it was nice. I had ended up getting in the 100 level because the 300 level I usually get tickets in was sold out. So I was in the more wealthy area. They have nicer food and drinks on that level. I didn’t have money yesterday though ha ha. This guy next to me asked the lady going around selling drinks how much a water was and it was nine dollars! So yeah I dehydrated since I wasn’t paid until today, but Charli was great ha ha ha. I was like the little dried up Spongebob at the end of the concert. But it was still a good time!

Tonight my friend and I are going to the Polaris Prize gala because I’m on the board of Native Women In the Arts and we get free tickets to it every year. So that will be fun, I’m planning on wearing sequins.

I got my grant so I was able to pay some bills and buy some new jeans and underwear. And pay for music lessons again. So that’s nice. And pay back some people I owed money to. I hope I remembered them all. Anyway, it’s meant for living on and making a video so I’m glad I can live again.

I was just sort of trapped at home. I even had to quit going to the gym because I had no money to pay my membership until today. I was getting very buff though with all my gym time, so I’m hoping to get back on my schedule on Thursday. I was doing Tuesday, Thursday, and either Saturday or Sunday, and I was getting muscly and doing better! I want to keep it up.

I also signed up for singing lessons again, I had to take a break when I was broke, but always meant to come back. So that will be nice. I took a week off from guitar because I was broke but get to go back to it on Friday. I was getting pretty good at Manic Depression. I can now play all the parts through. I definitely need to work on speed and memorizing the order, but it’s way easier for me to play. So that’s exciting. I still don’t know what I’ll do with these guitar skills. I figured out another part of my song I am writing, I wrote it down in my diary. So I still need a bridge and a riff. But I’ve also been studying blues guitar stuff with my teacher so I am learning more about which areas of the fretboard sound good with which other areas.

What else? I’m getting through some gigs. I had a conversation after a screening in Vienna today. On the weekend I am finally showing the Trans Piss Project at PAVED Arts in Saskatoon in the When is Future/When is Now show curated by the Wolf Babe Collective. So that is exciting! It’s the first time the Trans Piss Project is showing anywhere, and it gets to be in the windows at PAVED. So if you would like to see three billionaire transphobes suspended in 100% trans piss, go walk by! Opening is on Friday Sept 25 from 7-9:30pm. I will not be there, but if you’re in Saskatoon please go have some cheese for me. It will be up from Sept 25 to Dec 11.

I’m also doing a lot of keyboard practice. I’m learning more and more all the time and hoping it keeps my brain working long enough.

Oct 9th I get to see the neurosurgeon. I’m not sure how that is going to go, considering the neurologist wasn’t very helpful. I do want to know my brain has some hope, or at least know what is going to happen to me in the future. Like is it just going to get to a walnut size? What do I do with that? And is it like concentrated now? Like a can of orange juice pulp from the 80s? Man I miss that freezer orange juice. That seemed like a good idea but I never buy juice like that now. But like is that why I’m getting lots of good ideas? Because my brain is just squished down really tight so all my ideas are too close to each other and getting active?

Anyway. this week I continue with work and start editing my film again. OMG I can go shopping for stock footage now! That’s always fun. I like looking for videos, I get it from POND5 and they have interesting things. But what else? I have to do my novel too, I put it away since near the end of August, so I think I have enough time away from it that I can look at it again. I figured out something I want to include in the next iteration. It made me cry when I thought about it so I think it works.

AHHH I have to go dig up some kind of decent t shirt I can wear under a sequin jacket for the Polaris, so I should go look around. It’s a general admission ticket which is nice because it’s by the stage but sucks because there’s no seats and I hate standing forever. I’ll be okay. I wish I could bring my own chair ha ha.