Survey Says

Some interesting surveys came out this past week. So far it’s been confirmed; lesbians have better and more frequent orgasms than straight women; liberals have more imaginative and sexual dreams than conservatives; napping makes you smarter; people blog as therapy; women are aroused just as fast as men; Christians are more likely to have unprotected sex; and Thirza Cuthand is undoubtedly the most beautiful butch on the planet. Ha ha, I made that last one up. But really, two of those things I could have told the researchers. I don’t know where this whole bullshit came from women having to be “in the mood,” although in romantic situations, yeah, we’d want it timed right and stuff, but more for various relationship goals or in the interest of self protection than because we’re not wet as a waterslide. Sometimes I’ve walked home from people/situations with drenched panties but that didn’t mean I wanted to do it. And porn turns me on really fast, erotica takes a little while longer because there’s character development or some form of a plot. Even some of the amateur erotica has like, three paragraphs describing some blondie’s butt, boobs, measurements, age, etc etc. BORING! Plus the average dick size goes from 7.5 to 15 inches, HA! In reality average is about five inches.

As for the lesbians have better sex, FER SURE! And I don’t think it’s that men can’t please women just as well, it’s that a lot of them are sadly lazy. They think penetration is enough and totally forget the all important little nubbly bit that’s the size of a pencil eraser (well, for some, other’s have huge schlongy clits). And I think women fake it a lot because they just give up all hope of coming because it’s getting late and they’re getting tired and he’s all sweaty and smelly and it’s just not going to happen with the old in out. Poor ladies. There needs to be some kind of clitoral outreach program for straight men, vans that travel around handing out pamphletes and showing where the clit is on a little rubber model of a vag.

As for the Christians, I suspect there is going to be an HIV/AIDS outbreak in Christian communities that their church leaders are going to have to deal with, and sadly then I think we’ll finally see real progress in research and prevention.

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