Equestrian Philosophy

Horses teach mindfulness really well too. Actually, I was surprised to find out how difficult some people find horseback riding. I think the key is to be comfortable in your body, because some of those maneuvers, I mean, they are kind of sensual. Like doing a pelvic thrust to get your horse to start walking. And then you have to kick it to change speeds, but you can’t be mean about it, it’s more like an insistent nudge. Maybe the best part of horseback riding is that they tell you to fuck off if you’re making mistakes. I’ve never been bucked off a horse, not when I was a kid anyway. I have had to calm a galloping horse down though, which was intense because no one had trained me how to do that. Her companion horse got angry and took off after bucking off the other rider, and so she went full tilt after him, and I was stuck on the back. We let him run it out, he came back for oats, it was fine.

I was sent to horse camp when I was a preteen. I got short changed though, I was stuck in a little kid class and we only rode horses a couple times. Aside from that they drove us around in a big buick. I remember one time I was getting my horse ready and this little girl came up and asked “Is your horse’s name Satin or Satan?” And I was like, oh honestly, where the hell did you come from? My horse’s name is Satin of course!

A horse named Satan indeed!

The best part of riding horses is that you have to dote on them, you can’t just push them around. It takes at least half an hour to get a horse ready. And you have to feed them and give them treats. And you have to calm them down after or they get all foamy sweaty, and horse sweat is gross. And you have to look after their feet, because sometimes you have to clean the frog or there’s a pebble in there or something. And you have to be gentle about that too or you will get such a kick. But you can also have boundaries with your horse, if they know you won’t let them get away with something then they are pretty docile. But again, you have to be careful with them because they are honestly huge and powerful.

I’d like to ride horses again.