Sweet goodbyes to docs and groomers

I’ve been apartment/roommate hunting for the past while.  Everything else is in place, except the housing thing.  BUT I have found an apartment building in my price range and within walking distance to Ryerson.  I’m waiting for the manager to fax me the application and then I am gonna fill it out and fax it back and hope for good news.  It’s tiny, I knew I would have to live in a tiny place though, and my dogs are also tiny so it’s ok.

I will just have to pay for internet, cell, and transit pass and groceries!  Which is still a lot.  BUT it’s not too bad.

I’m getting excited.  I saw my psychiatrist for possibly the last time today.  She gave me a prescription for ativan as needed when I can’t sleep, and we said our goodbyes.  Little Mister went to his groomer’s for the last time, and they gave him a little zebra striped tie instead of a bandana.  I’m saving it for special occasions.  I have to remember all the things I need to do before I leave.

Like I have to get my iPhone unlocked, so I can use it with another carrier in Toronto.  I have to get Little Mister’s vet history from his vet so I can share it with his next vet, and in case we cross the border some day.  I have to give away a whole bunch of books I don’t really want anymore.  I have to do another cull of my clothing.  I have to pack everything and get it organized and in easy to get spots for the movers.  I have to gather money for first and last month’s rent AND money for the movers.  Right now a lot of my money is coming to me in the future, the near future but still it’s not in hand.  I think I’ve got about $1000 I can access at the end of the month.  And another 1000 that has to go to rent in Toronto.

Whew.  I put 200 down on my moving expenses, and I paid for my cargo and plane ticket to Toronto.

I still haven’t heard if Little Pine is funding me.  And I still haven’t heard if Canada Council is giving me a grant.  It’s getting so close to the time I have to leave!  It’s worrisome!  I don’t know why Little Pine hasn’t made decisions yet.

I’m also worried about being poor, yet again.  I guess I am poor now.  But it’s easier here, my rent isn’t so high, and I get more a month now on disability than I will on living allowance.  It sucks.  Like, there is a $250 difference, and that’s groceries for the month!  That’s a lot of money.

I’m looking for TA/GA jobs everyday on the website, some are starting to be posted but they seem to be for math and engineering ones, which I am clearly not remotely qualified for.

ANYWAY! I am still pretty excited about leaving Saskatoon.  It’s been a super frustrating place to live, because there are so many things missing from it that I know I can get in a bigger city.  Like a queer film fest, and an Indigenous Film fest, and probably jobs because I can’t get them here because I have a Native last name and hiring folks here are deeply racist, like most of Saskatchewan.  Like, I don’t even get interviews or callbacks.  Even for things I am qualified for.  Anyway, grrrr!  And there aren’t a lot of women that I am interested in here.  Not really anyone, really.  Nobody! And I know I could get at least a couple dates in Toronto, and eventually meet someone.  And the industry I want to work in is there.  And there are more arts things.  And competition would be stiff, but that is ok.

So I’ve been ready to leave for a long time.

I’ve been so stressed out here with the house being on the market, and all the cleaning that we do for the viewings, and blah blah blah.  And then having my laptop in the shop for a while.  It’s back now!  I hope it stays home now and works properly and doesn’t mess up!  It went through two hardware tests and passed them both.

Well, time to unwind.  I promised myself when I got lappy back I would watch Community on Netflix.  So maybe I will do that.

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