Cyber is a word that has fallen out of fashion. It was very popular for a while, enough so that a certain pliable sex toy material was named Cyberskin. I never understood why it was called that. God, sex toy materials have seriously improved since I was a pup going around trying to get sexy in the world. Like, I remember those jelly dildos that people eventually stopped buying because they would secrete some kind of toxic chemical. Why did we do that as a species?
So I’m in this new url, and hopefully it goes well. I did realize I needed to update all my links on my socials. Which is a drag. Changing my name all over the place was a pain in the ass but now I have to go back to all those places and update my url. Depressing! I think I’m probably going to change my name to something beginning with a T that isn’t just an initial, but I’ve decided to reserve the use of that name for close friends and family, and I am going to retain TJ as my professional name. And I don’t know what my secret name will be, I keep thinking maybe Theo but I looked it up and I think it was super Christian or something? It’s origins made me feel weird anyway!
Although I do like that Theo was Vincent Van Gogh’s brother who supported him through his failing art career.
And I had a rat named Theo when I was a kid!
But no I am not Theo.
I went to a Leather Swap today and it was super cute. I haven’t been able to mingle with people in real life in a while. Most of my dates have been coming from apps and that kind of thing, mostly Lex and Tinder (and Grindr if I ever manage to have a hookup). But this was nice, got to have flirty eye contact with people, super fun! Made me feel hopeful again.
I’m so excited to tell my therapist that I am hopeful again. OMG I finally get to see my amazing therapist in person on Monday!!! I’ve never had an in person therapy session with her. And internet instability always happens at the worst times, and I drop out, or she drops out, or I have to keep turning my camera on. The last session we had was online and at the end my internet kicked me off for the last minute of my session so I didn’t get to say goodbye properly. Which was too bad. BUT not so bad now because I get to see her in real life until I have to travel again.
What else? I feel like I’m such a defensive crab about dating just because some people approached me in ways that didn’t feel good. BUT I am honestly open to it. I just am extremely picky and like being treated like a human being. Like, don’t go into sexy things right away that just irks me. I like light conversation until I know someone isn’t a bad weirdo. Good weirdos are fine, but creepy weirdos are very much unwanted. And I will talk about my kinks and stuff I just need to have a bit more of a feel for someone first before opening up. It’s honestly not THAT hard to date me, I am pretty easy going if someone isn’t crossing my boundaries.