It’s finally time for me to do the Vienna Residency and I am here! I have a nice studio, lots of room. The bed is small but decent. There’s a washing machine in here which is nice, and a tiny dishwasher. I finally went to the supermarket today to get some things and it’s so close, like on the next corner down the way. I got some currants which I never see in Canada. I also got some breakfast things and snack things. I went back for more snacks because I needed something salty. I’m trying to avoid candy and chocolate (I’ll prob have some chocolate though) because of the pre-diabetic thing. I hope this helps. I am staying across the street from a really cute bakery though so I might eat pastries once in a while.
I’ve been constantly working the last several days so I took yesterday to rest most of the time, I was all jet lagged yesterday also so I needed it. Today has been better. I am going to try and get some work done tomorrow though, probably on my script and also my video game. I watched a tutorial on making a maze in Unity 2D, so it’s helping me come up with ideas for the cemetery level. I’m really stuck on how to draw the main character. A Bipolar Journey was so easy to draw because they were just giant heads rolling around. But I’m not sure I want to do the same thing with this character. I mean I guess she could just be a head with vampire fangs. It would make it easier to have her moving through the world that way. Ha ha omg this reminds me of that French and Saunders skit where they are being a famous art couple and the interviewer is asking Jennifer why she draws people with hands behind their back and French comes along and goes “She can’t draw fingers!” Ha ha all the cheesy Britcom lines that live in my head. That was a funny episode tho.
I had kind of a rough few days. I had some conflict that was very emotionally abusive and violent towards me and it sucked. I don’t really want to talk about it much, and I know largely it was about the other persons shit. But it still sucks to get dumped on. Anyway, oddly enough it kind of turned around my depression just because I knew all the things they were telling me were wrong and they were deliberately trying to get a rise out of me. Still sucked but I had therapy right after that and it went really well, just like processing this huge conflict.
My therapist and I were worried she wouldn’t be able to work with me remotely while I am here. But it was ok with her insurance and the Ontario college of whatever (I’m sorry I just don’t feel like looking up the name that regulates therapists) and then it was just trying to see if Austria would allow it. And there was a delay finding out because my therapist had to write to them in English and they weren’t responding right away. But today we found out from them that it is fine. So I’m relieved to be able to see her again next week, online. I was prepared to not be able to see her, so this is a happy surprise. Especially because I was talking to her about noticing myself standing up for myself more and being happy about it. And wondering how events in the past would have unfolded differently if they happened today. Like, if I met my ex this year, I might have been more inclined to leave after not being treated right for a long time. I mean the thing is it wouldn’t have happened for a long time, I think I would have recognized a lost cause faster and left the situation earlier.
I’m not really looking for love right now. I get on Tinder and don’t really care. Grindr is meh. I DID have a Grindr hookup and it was fun in some ways and kinda awkward in other ways. He was a nice guy, I think it just wasn’t ideal. But also I’m not sure I care about sex or love right now. I was super horny for a while but I think I just got too stressed out with everything to think about sex or love. It’s fine, I’ll care about it some other time. Right now I’m just focused on my work. I need to get two scripts done and also a video game and also a webseries.
I ordered some coveralls for my webseries. I hope they arrive ok. I’m a bit dubious about my address. I’m not really doing ubereats here either because I’m not sure how to let them know which door to come to, and its like, a block long complex so a long walk if they go to the wrong door.