Consolation Bannock

I held off on posting a new post at the end of the year because one, I was trying to get more people to hit the link to download my video game, and two, I was very high most of New Year’s Eve. Having all kinds of thoughts that I thought would probably cause problems if I freely wrote about them here while high.

So I am high again BUT not as high because there’s no edibles today and my thoughts are a bit more ruly than they were at NYE/NYD.

I made myself a Dutch Baby pancake for New Year’s Day breakfast and some beef tenderloin and au gratin potatoes and broccolini for dinner. It was a nice chill day but a lot of dishes needed to be washed. Maybe I can stay on top of that chore this year. 30% of my domestic problems would be solved if I washed the dishes on a more consistent basis. I would feel free to cook more for one thing, instead of ordering in all the time. I would like to bake more too. I was gonna bake a pie on Christmas but I had no flour. So I got flour for NYE but when I went to make the crust I didn’t have white vinegar. And then I thought I would make myself a consolation Baked Bannock, but I had no baking powder so that idea was destroyed too. Basically it’s just been a very long time since I have baked and I need to sort myself out again with supplies.

I don’t know if I was avoiding baking because I didn’t think it was masculine. I know I was avoiding some things I like because it makes it easier to pass as a man without them. Like I miss my gel nails but I haven’t done that partially because of poverty but also because I’m a faggot and not used to being hated as a faggot instead of hated as a dyke. So I AM going to do them but I’m just not ready yet. I do like baking though and also it has a great byproduct, being baked goods. Which are always great! Even a consolation bannock would have been amazing. But I just haven’t baked much this last while. BUT ALSO baking is just like, not a gendered thing. It’s ridiculous that people even go there with it. What makes putting dough in a hot oven and cooking a pastry feminine? It could be a real butch little pastry for all you know, like a tourtière is pretty butch isn’t it? It’s a goddamn meat pie, Sweeney Todd made them out of people. How much more masculine could you get than a little Québécois meat pie?

I wasn’t gonna make a meat pie tho, I was just gonna make a cherry pie.

BUT on the other hand, I still have almost all the ingredients for a cherry pie that I could make at any time. And not so much toxic gender ideology like “You’re a fag for baking!” Although I am a fag but because I suck cock sometimes, not because I bake.

I went to the gym today for the first time this year. It went pretty good, I upped my weight on a few exercises, and tried the declining bench press with dumbbells, which is supposed to be good for the lower half of my pecs. I’m trying to get some perky muscleboobs. I am gonna go to the gym again this week and then on the weekend I am going to boxing class. Which has been going well, I am getting into the groove of it again. I’m not sure lifting weights and boxing goes together. I don’t want to end up all musclebound and not able to throw a decent punch. I don’t know I suppose if things go awry I will notice. I don’t really know if muscles would hinder me, it’s not like I box competitively.

Posey and I have been hanging out all holidays. It’s not really been 100% Holiday time over here. I had work to get through over the holidays, along with trying to post my video game different places to get downloads. And I don’t know if Christmas is a good time to launch a video game, probably a lot of people didn’t have money because of Christmas. Although it is free. But also people were busy. I did appreciate the people who downloaded it though! Thanks so much for playing it!

I need to make another gameplay trailer because I realize some of the features that ended up being in it aren’t in the current trailer. Like there’s a noise when she bites people that is kind of cute. So I gotta redo it, but I’m just like UGH my computer slows down so much when I record my game play in Unity and it’s really aggravating. Also just because I have to play the game doing all the cute things to show how fun it is. But also because it’s so slow, I don’t get accurate time reading the text dialogue, so when I play the recording back the text changes too fast to read. But it works fine in the game. Anyway I guess I will try to record this again tomorrow.

So I have work, video game marketing work, and a meeting tomorrow. That’s all just work. I feel jelly of the people who still have this week off. At the same time I needed to make money! At the same time I’m not getting paid until the third week of January so I’m living on fumes until then trying to continue plugging away at eventual money making work. BUT ALSO maybe tomorrow I will go get baking powder and vinegar and make a pie or a bannock or both! I have to do my laundry tomorrow too. SO MUCH WORK. I guess I have skills so that’s nice, but they need to be compensated in a better way. A more timely way!

If you want to download my video game it is here:

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